Friday, April 8, 2011

Great Expectations!

We met up with some old friends a couple of weekends ago. We planned to meet half way between our houses. We told them to pick the restaurant and we would meet them there. Now, to tell the whole truth they sent us a link to the restaurant they picked but we really only looked at the address so we could GPS it - food is food - right??

That's what we thought! Cam and I are not picky eaters and enjoy new things, but when the waiter came over and said he would have to "explain" the menu we knew we were in over our heads. We are not "expense account" diners - the church kind of frowns on that so when we pick a place to eat, it usually is reasonable and comes with a tray!

This place was a Tapas restaurant - I'm not even sure I'm spelling that right - it essentially means "little plates" or "tiny bites" - oh, cool, appetizers - Wrong again - why don't I just quick while I'm behind.

There were about 15 items on the menu all exquisitely described and the waiter told us he would arrange when the food would come out - don't all waiters do that??

We ordered 5 items and the first arrived - a cheese plate - yum - with 5 pieces of cheese the size of a postage stamp each - yikes I knew we were in trouble. The food continued in this size proportions. It was a bit awkward splitting a spare rib into fourths - but some how we managed!

In defense this was some of the best food I have ever tasted! It just was in "doll-size" portions. Is it rude to ask for seconds?

Which brings me to my point (finally, I know) If we had taken the time to read the menu before we went, we would have been prepared for the "experience". Which would have involved a pre-meal. But since we weren't we went away a little hungry.

How many times are my expectations dashed because I don't take the time to have a clear understanding of what will take place, what is expected of me, or what I expect of others. I do more communicating in my head sometimes than I do with the person I need to.

If I am mad at my husband, I need to let him know why and how we can work it out. If my kids are disappointing me, do they know what it is I wanted them to do in the first place. If a friend isn't "there" for me - did they know about the "appointment" in the first place.

We are not mind readers! When I was a kid I used to play a game where I would try to guess what card would be picked out of the deck - I lost every time. God has equipped us with mouths not ESP. So use them to speak clearly to others and then listen quietly - it is amazing how easily our expectations can be met when we do that!

P.S. - we had a GREAT visit with our friends and the after dinner coffees at Starbucks seemed cheap after that:)


  1. Too funny! I've never done tapas either, but I'll keep this info in mind if I ever do.
    "I do more communicating in my head sometimes than I do with the person I need to." - Guilty! Although I do sometimes need to get some of my crabbiness out of the way before sending it all in Tom's direction, lol. You're so right though, and when we did marriage counseling it was because we were terrible at communicating. Thanks!

  2. This is a good post. When we got married, I really didn't have any expectations and I think that helped me (I didn't have a great role model of marriage in my life).
    ANd I too communicate way more in my head.
    No expectations is a great strategy too.
    just roll with it and enjoy the ride, right?


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