I'm Dating Again!

And my boyfriends first name is Cameron!! Yes, I'm dating my husband - after all these years it's been fun to reconnect with the man I'm going to spend the rest of my life with! But it's easy for us - we don't need a babysitter.

When our kids were little, a friend told us that we should have a date night once a week, an overnight date once a month and a week of vacation (without kids) once a year - YEAH RIGHT!! He had 2 kids and a job where he earned a lot of money and air miles - I was a stay at home mom who was married to a pastor - but I was creative!

We would barter with other moms to trade off babysitting, call up Mimi and Boppie or we would use a youth group kid (Cam was the youth pastor, so we had a good connection.)  If I was going to pay a babysitter - and with 4 kids, I paid - I wanted to get the most bang for my buck.

We would try to go out late in the afternoon and be back after dinner. Most teens are willing to give up their Saturday afternoon as opposed to their Saturday night. And do you really want to pay someone to sit in your house while your kids are sleeping - let them do dinner and bedtime and then arrive home to a quiet house. And meals are cheaper at a restaurant during lunch or early bird specials - same food, lower prices.

If you plan to see a movie, a matinee is cheaper than night time - or go to dinner, pay the sitter and then watch the movie at home while the kids are asleep.

We only did this once, but it worked - we traded houses with a friend. She took care of my kids at her house while we had a nice dinner at her house (which she had prepared for us.) We then returned the favor the next night. The kids had a blast, it was like dinning at a country inn and there were no waitresses to tip.

Learn something new while the kids are being cared for. One Christmas Cam gave me the gift of a new bed - but there was a catch - we were going to make it. We had a friend who was a shop teacher and Cam had arranged for us to go to his shop once a week to work on our bed. We learned something new, spent time together and felt refreshed when we returned home to the kids.

The best gift you can give to your kids is to love their father or mother (yes, your spouse) and that means carving out the time to spend alone with them. It's hard work - I get that, but it is worth the effort, because eventually you are going to have kids that are in high school, one who is in college in Florida and one who is student teaching in the Dominican Republic - oh wait, that's me. But my point is, your day will come - and if you get there and you have no relationship with your spouse because you didn't nurture it along the way - it makes no sense!!